Tag: coming out

fallingforkonoha:

dateanonbinarysuggestion:

jdtheamazing:

National Coming Out Day is coming up (October 11) and I just want to remind everyone:

1) Please do not out anyone (even if you “think you are doing them a favor.” Trust me when I say you aren’t) and make sure you don’t accidentally do so.

2) It is okay to be in the closet. Please do not feel pressure to/obligated to come out because there so happens to be a Coming Out Day. (Do it for you if it’s what you want).

3) don’t “come out” as LGBT+ as a joke. Don’t “come out” as kinky/a furry/whatever, either.

4) Don’t force/coerce your friends and/or loved ones to come out, and do not get mad at them if they choose to stay closeted.

5) don’t come out as an ally

6) It’s okay to come out even if you don’t know for sure what you identify as yet, or if you’ve decided you don’t want a label.

7) It’s okay to come out again if your identity has changed. Coming out as gay is different to coming out as bi, for example, and coming out as trans is different to coming out as butch lesbian, and coming out as one of the flavours of queer is different to coming out as a label people have a more concrete understanding of. You are you, and who you are grows and changes over time. Doing it again doesn’t mean you were wrong or lying the previous time/s.

8) What you come out as is up to you. I use queer these days, but I have used lesbian in the past, because it’s shorthand and easier than saying ‘biromantic gender-nonconforming demisexual woman in a committed relationship with another woman’. I don’t have to lay out that though I’m probably on the bi or pan spectrum, I don’t identify as either of those because men are ‘unsafe’ for various reasons for me, and if I was dating rather than in a long-term relationship, if I was looking for a partner, I would be looking at pretty much any gender but male. I don’t have to explain that attraction for me is a fluctuating thing, and my sex drive is, too. I don’t have to explain that I don’t identify as transgender, but I feel that most of the construct of what people think of as ‘female’ doesn’t work for me either. I just say queer. And for those who don’t or won’t understand queer, I say lesbian, and that makes most people happy because I’ve put myself in a box they can understand, even if it’s not strictly true. If calling yourself a label like ‘gay’ when you come out makes it easier or safer for you, then use it. It’s a tool, not a shackle.

threelisabeth:

a friend of mine told me about her friend i think from high school who was gay but not out, and he pretended for a while to have a girlfriend named Amanda who he would go see a lot, and they’d be all, come hang out with us and he’d be like sorry I’ve got a date with Amanda, and they were like when are we gonna meet this Amanda??? anyway he kept this up for like a year until he finally came out; and when his friends were like, “wait, what about Amanda?” he said, “IT’S A MAN, DUH.” 

i have literally never admired anyone’s commitment to a joke more

kayliesaurusrex:

gambleorcs:

I was trying to explain to my grandma what being bisexual meant and saying that I looked at ladies butts and she was all
“You’re not GAY everyone checks out ladies rear ends” and my sister was like “I have never wanted to look at a ladies butt”
Later my grandma called me and was like “I THINK I MIGHT BE A LITTLE GAY”

BEST GRANDMA STORY

porbgershwin:

yesterday i went to a gay bar for the first time, and I met two people. The first was a man well into his 70′s, who had only come out since his wife died. Even though he could barely walk, he knew every single person at the bar, and each one came over for a hug and to chat. The second was a transgender woman who, after two children and three grandchildren, had finally decided to live as herself. She was wearing heels and leather pants and makeup, and she was absolutely beautiful. she knew she was as well, and she was so proud and excited when people walked by and said “hey girl” without even thinking about it. point i’m trying to make is, it’s never too late to come out